Blessing : By Cathy Zakedis
9 years ago today, I was given a surprise blessing from God. I didn’t understand this blessing. I felt completely incompetent to accept such a blessing. I asked the “why me?” questions. Then I came up with this brilliant thought, God must want me to fix this blessing. So I gave every ounce of who I was into this blessing to make it into what I thought my blessing should be. But this did not work and I hit bottom. I felt like such a failure. Once again…why would God give me such a blessing if I am so incompetent? Then softly, gently and yes at points painfully, God touched me. He helped me accept this special blessing. He helped me understand that this blessing has a very special purpose in life, and in my life.
This Blessing is to show me very tangible, unconditional love. There will not be a day where I will not be snuggled and hugged and told that I am loved. This Blessing is to show me perseverance and how to have courage. My journey here on earth has shifted course and now because of my deep love of this Blessing, I have no choice but to stand up and speak, where as before I would run and hide. This Blessing has taught me surrender and forgiveness. I have no choice now but to enter the world (instead of strategically hiding from the world) which means the great possibility of failure. This brings great fear. This brings great guilt. But because of my Blessing I have learned to surrender to my God. I have accepted his forgiveness and I am learning to forgive myself. This is a long slow process but because of my Blessing, I am growing, I am gaining confidence, I am gaining self worth.
Because of my Blessing I can see and accept Gods love for me as I go about taking great care of my Blessing.My Blessing has brought me joy. There are so many hard days. So many tough decisions. So much uncertainty. Many days there are tears. BUT there has not been one single day (even in my lowest of lows) that this beautiful blessing has not brought a smile to my face and much laughter to my life.
Thank you Lord, for being such a loving God and knowing exactly the perfect blessing to bestow upon me.
Happy Birthday Timothy!
I love you sooooo much,